I did something so incredibly cheesy I’m hesitant to even share anywhere on the Interweb that someone I know (or potentially know) could see. That’s kind of how I know I need to just need to dish. I committed to myself today – with a ring, flowers, and bought myself a cake. Going into the details of where and what was said shall remain private, as any truly romantic ceremony is. Once on Facebook I put myself in a relationship with myself for about two weeks (apparently my two week commitment streak lasts as long to myself as to men, go figure). I haven’t been taking very good care of myself proof as of late by eating not so nutritious foods, catching H1N1, not making time for yoga, etc. This renewing commitment to myself reminds me of what comes first, not in selfish way instead a reminder of loving me means loving others. My capacity to love others is only proportionate to my capacity to love me. Our society puts so much emphasis on signficant relationships as being romantic and I whole heartedly disagree.
I’m beginning to sound more and more like a single twentysomething (later twenty something I might add) so it only feels appropriate to interject my favorite Sex and the City Carrie Bradshaw quote, “Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.”
The sudden desire to commit came shortly after my sister’s wedding – I had this epiphany that I don’t really want to get married. (I want to be sure to preface this that everyone has different wants and needs and this is just my take on marriage.) It’s beginning to feel more romantic to me not to get married and instead create a partnership without paper. This feels more freeing…if the point of a relationship is to grow and learn I want the freedom to know when that phase has ended not to keep myself in the situation because of a legally binding contract. I want someone to stay with me without pressure because our lives together make more sense to serving the world and our individual life purposes. If we have kids together and decide we do want different legal rights or tax benefits a trip to the courthouse over our lunch break would suffice.
As Ms. Bradshaw finishes the last season of Sex and the City with a firm stance that our life-long romance begins with us. For the record a commitment ceremony with rings, flowers, and cake is always an option…with or without a mate. The relationship with ourselves isn’t optional.
Today I’m grateful for Watercourse foods, cute boys who wave at me from their bikes, and gift cards.